Ever wondered how it looks like? As you cruise nicely and comfortably on the highway that is your current life… have you wondered where the tiny road on the side might look like?
You haven’t heard from me for a few months now and the reason is: after designing the Soul Searching Journey this summer, I had to go deep into my own journey and travel down that road. And let me tell you… It is as beautiful as it is scary… as magical, full of wonders and miracles as it is full of pain, disappointments and heartaches.
That road is not smooth asphalt, it is bumpy and rocky.
It is not straight with a clear destination signposted in front of you, it is winding and foggy and you can’t see past the present moment.
It is not predictable in any way, which makes way for a lot of surprises… and it is up to you to make it good ones by keeping your spirits high and your hope in something better unwavering… or not…
This is how the road less travelled looks like…
You feel just as Luke Skywalker entering the cave of his unconscious as Master Yoda warns ‘Oh but afraid you will be…’
And afraid, doubting myself and my sanity, I have been, many times, but you know what? Because I had the courage to leave behind me everything, only holding a candle light, that road gets less scary by the day.
Because when you have the strength to do a leap of faith, with no idea of what is awaiting below, similar to Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade (yes I do watch a lot of movies and TV series… we each have our own issues ;), God / Goddess / the Great Energy / Spirit, however you are comfortable calling it, catches you. As you waver and stumble, it holds you. And when you feel lonely, so lonely, He/She/It sends you company… in many forms…
That road is calling, not a thing on your to do list, or a KPI you have set for yourself before you turn X years old.
It is a calling… Chances are, if you are reading this, you have heard this calling too and you heard it several times in your life but you ignored it. And now it’s becoming louder…
There is no escaping from a calling. Or rather there is, because you have free will… But then your life becomes miserable. You get sick, you feel you’re constantly choking, you have an emptiness inside that you cannot explain.
That emptiness is the echo of the contract you signed before you were born, the promise you gave yourself in front of the Creator to become a certain someone… not ‘somebody’ as society would define it, full of your self image, your so called power and money… no, a someone that is the highest, most powerful, totally liberated version of yourself… And it is not your Creator who punishes you in this life for not following your calling, He/She/It doesn’t punish, humans do… It is your own self, your higher self, your soul that gets so sick, so hurt, so bruised and battered that it translates to your body, heart and mind.
It is hard as hell to follow that road… because you have only your own faith to guide you.
The majority of people around you, friends, family and mere strangers, at best do not understand you, at worse criticise and gossip about you “Oh but she had everything… how can she make a decision like that… surely she must have some sort of psychological problem”… And here we are ladies and gentlemen… When you do not fit in the box anymore, when you forfeit society’s rules and regulations, when you become ab-normal (understand: outside of the set ‘norm’) that definitely means you are sick and needs to be treated with heavy medication. Isn’t that sad? I think so… And however old you are you battle with those conceptions of life that are not your own and that bring you down every time someone holds a judgement about you and your ‘insane’ choices.
And they do bring you down… because there is only you on that road. You with your faith. You with your hopes and dreams and wishes. You with your tiny candle light and your own shadow to keep you company.
Yes, it is a hard road. But it is also beautiful, magical, full of synchronicities and things you never thought would manifest. On that road, your only job is to hope, to wish and let the great energy manifest your dreams in a way your tiny human brain would have never imagined. You have to let go of all the plans and surrender fully to the magic of life. You just aim, set the direction, prepare yourself for it, train, read, become better in all the fields that are important to you (well you do have to earn it now don’t you?) but then you let go…
On that road you have to live fully in the now. You set your aim and let go as manifestation of space and time is not under your control. It is in the hands of something much bigger than you.
The more you understand it the more you make way for incredible manifestations. And life, instead of being ‘ab-normal’, becomes ‘extra-ordinary’, meaning: outside of the ordinary… Now isn’t that a path worth fighting for?